Sorry, everyone. Just wanted to say that I'm alive, and for the most part, well! It's been over 2 weeks with me neglecting this blog and I apologize. There happens to be a lot going on in my life right now that seems to pull me in other directions. For instance, school! I'm enrolled full time into a local college (going for Communications in Technology, by the way) and I just completed my first week. Prior to school starting, the week before was equally busy since I'd had to arrange everything to make sure I was enrolled as a full time student, in time. This was an arduous task that kept me up nights. See, I'd signed up VERY late and there was the chance I might not get in at all! But thankfully, everything eventually worked out, though it was practically the Friday before school began when I'd finally crossed my last T and dotted my last i.
I am, however, a returning college student. This would not have been possible if it had not been for the Resveratrol discovery and Christian's diet. Thank you, thank you! And I have to assert that I've been very strict about taking the pills and eating appropriately. I have to also note, that one day, a couple weekends ago, I cheated on the diet and ate a bunch of chicken! I pigged out in a gluttonous feast! (This was due to the fact that there was a party at the house and this tempting food was everywhere!! I couldn't resist.) Then the next day, I had some friends over who are excellent chefs and they whipped up this amazing dinner that was Glutamate loaded and I'd decided to test. Well, the test failed the next day. I felt like "crappola"!
The good news was the little test, reaffirmed in me that I am on a good diet. It also is a really nice treat to be loosing weight along the way. I'm down to 195. Dagnabit! I was down to 193 prior to that smorgasbord weekend, but the over indulgence actually made me gain two pounds. I also haven't had time to walk like I was before. Gotta do that. Walking is so healthy physically and mentally, as well.
So, I'd better go. School books are calling and their "louder" than a nest of hungry birds! I was starting to feel a little overwhelmed by taking 5 classes, so I cut down to 4 which is still full time. I did this due to the fact that I'm also currently enrolled, as I've said before, in the Institute of Children's Literature course online, which is a 6 credit course that takes about a year and a 1/2 to complete. Then, on top of that, is a non-credited course load for Entrepreneurship at the college. It takes place every Tuesday night for a number of weeks. FULL SCHEDULE!!!
There are a few other things going on as well, externally which are affecting me internally, but I will have to get into it at another time.
And to those of you who've been trying to contact me, I apologize if I haven't gotten back to you recently. Things will begin to settle for me once I'm more comfortable with this new life style. Thanks for checking back though!
The saga continues...
Sunday, September 6, 2009
Sunday, August 16, 2009
Dancing in the bathroom. A strange psychotic episode???
NOOO! I just lost weight!!
Everything is awesome! I just wanted to write a quick note that, after 4 years of trying to reduce my weight below the all elusive 200 pound mark (I'm 6 foot), I finally broke through the barrier today! I actually weighed in at 198!! This is huge for me explaining my celebratory behavior.
You may be saying, "Big deal, it's 2 pounds." Which is true, but what is also true is that invisible wall has been this perimeter that I simply could not get past. My weight, before this change in eating, would "yo-yo" up and down between 200 and 208 pounds. It would hover at 203, then climb the next day to 206, then the next day down to 202, then in a couple days sky rocket to 208, and then crash land down to 200, but never to go below. And then it would start all over again.
Looking back, and I discussed this previously with Christian, it must have been water weight. He'd mentioned that the Glutamate was probably the culprit. Fat cells don't change that quickly. And it looks like it was! Since the new diet, the scale has settled down and rested between 200 and 201. It's done this for the last month, but today, the scale FINALLY dipped down below that invisible barrier for the first time IN 4 YEARS!!! Also my blood pressure has normalized. It used to be high!
It just points to the healthy nature of this diet. I really can't imagine eating any better than I am right now. It's unbelievable how it's changed me mentally, and now physically.
The proof is in the glutamate-free pudding!
P.S. - There's no such thing as glutamate-free pudding. Eat an apple instead.
Everything is awesome! I just wanted to write a quick note that, after 4 years of trying to reduce my weight below the all elusive 200 pound mark (I'm 6 foot), I finally broke through the barrier today! I actually weighed in at 198!! This is huge for me explaining my celebratory behavior.
You may be saying, "Big deal, it's 2 pounds." Which is true, but what is also true is that invisible wall has been this perimeter that I simply could not get past. My weight, before this change in eating, would "yo-yo" up and down between 200 and 208 pounds. It would hover at 203, then climb the next day to 206, then the next day down to 202, then in a couple days sky rocket to 208, and then crash land down to 200, but never to go below. And then it would start all over again.
Looking back, and I discussed this previously with Christian, it must have been water weight. He'd mentioned that the Glutamate was probably the culprit. Fat cells don't change that quickly. And it looks like it was! Since the new diet, the scale has settled down and rested between 200 and 201. It's done this for the last month, but today, the scale FINALLY dipped down below that invisible barrier for the first time IN 4 YEARS!!! Also my blood pressure has normalized. It used to be high!
It just points to the healthy nature of this diet. I really can't imagine eating any better than I am right now. It's unbelievable how it's changed me mentally, and now physically.
The proof is in the glutamate-free pudding!
P.S. - There's no such thing as glutamate-free pudding. Eat an apple instead.
Saturday, August 15, 2009
What other tools do I use in my arsenal against the dreaded condition?
Things are great. Feels good to be able to write that. The food situation is working out spectacularly. I'm eating really well.
I also have to say though that I'm attacking the condition in two other ways. Nutrition seems to go to the root of the problem releasing me from heavy nastiness of the antagonist Glutamate. Resveratrol seems to be helping with this also, by eliminating or lowering the levels of the "bad guy" as well. This is fantastic. Physiologically this stabilizes by thoughts and moods to a healthy, dare I say - more normal (I know... what the heck is normal?) level.
But I wondered what else I could do to assist in the problem. Is there anything else that can be done physiologically to sharpen my mind?
YES - exercise!
So, I'd decided to begin an exercise regimen, albeit a pretty modest one. Now, I'm in decent shape but I could still stand to loose a few more pounds. However, as nice as it would be to achieve my ultimate goal weight, my main desire is to achieve the ultimate in state of mind. In the past, I'd noticed that walking for at least a 1/2 hour made me feel terrific afterward. Therefore, I pulled the treadmill out of the garage, set it up in the living room and now walk at least a 1/2 hour a day. Been doing this for the past week and a half and I love it. I feel immediate results and it really boosts my mood and clears my thoughts.
But to make the walk speed by quickly, without boredom, I do the second important new activity in my mental fitness "program". And that would be reading. I love self help books. I soak them up because I love that they give me useful information and techniques for improving my life in a manner that can be applied immediately. So I am now reading Anthony Robbin's second book (just finished the first - "Personal Power") "Awaken the Giant Within". Not only do I read but I actively apply his simple yet powerful methods to my newly healthy brain.
I do this because, after living with this dreaded condition for so long, I've found that it's left a bit of a jaded residue. I never realized and always took for granted the negative thinking I'd lead myself in daily. I mean, let's face it, when your brain is in a different state or phase physiologically, mentally and emotionally every 1/2 hour (not always, but on average when I wasn't well - even with medication!), I would find myself completely frustrated to say the least in figuring out a way to cope. This has since changed. My brain is physiologically healthier, it seems because of the way I eat, the Resveratrol and the little bit of medicine I still take. (Hopefully there will be a day without the meds all together, but I don't want to rush.) I now have a mostly clear pallet to work on. Even still, though, I noticed that my thoughts still leaned on the negative side.
That's where these books come in and help me to control my thoughts in a healthier, more productive way. It's interesting to note that this is not the first time I've read "Awaken the Giant Within". I did many years ago, with the hope that it alone would fix my problem. It didn't. My brain was so far out of whack, that I couldn't focus or control my emotions and thoughts long enough to effectively utilize the techniques.
Now my story is different! I've got control physiologically. So, I now work to control my thoughts as effectively. And I think it's working well!
I also have to say though that I'm attacking the condition in two other ways. Nutrition seems to go to the root of the problem releasing me from heavy nastiness of the antagonist Glutamate. Resveratrol seems to be helping with this also, by eliminating or lowering the levels of the "bad guy" as well. This is fantastic. Physiologically this stabilizes by thoughts and moods to a healthy, dare I say - more normal (I know... what the heck is normal?) level.
But I wondered what else I could do to assist in the problem. Is there anything else that can be done physiologically to sharpen my mind?
YES - exercise!
So, I'd decided to begin an exercise regimen, albeit a pretty modest one. Now, I'm in decent shape but I could still stand to loose a few more pounds. However, as nice as it would be to achieve my ultimate goal weight, my main desire is to achieve the ultimate in state of mind. In the past, I'd noticed that walking for at least a 1/2 hour made me feel terrific afterward. Therefore, I pulled the treadmill out of the garage, set it up in the living room and now walk at least a 1/2 hour a day. Been doing this for the past week and a half and I love it. I feel immediate results and it really boosts my mood and clears my thoughts.
But to make the walk speed by quickly, without boredom, I do the second important new activity in my mental fitness "program". And that would be reading. I love self help books. I soak them up because I love that they give me useful information and techniques for improving my life in a manner that can be applied immediately. So I am now reading Anthony Robbin's second book (just finished the first - "Personal Power") "Awaken the Giant Within". Not only do I read but I actively apply his simple yet powerful methods to my newly healthy brain.
I do this because, after living with this dreaded condition for so long, I've found that it's left a bit of a jaded residue. I never realized and always took for granted the negative thinking I'd lead myself in daily. I mean, let's face it, when your brain is in a different state or phase physiologically, mentally and emotionally every 1/2 hour (not always, but on average when I wasn't well - even with medication!), I would find myself completely frustrated to say the least in figuring out a way to cope. This has since changed. My brain is physiologically healthier, it seems because of the way I eat, the Resveratrol and the little bit of medicine I still take. (Hopefully there will be a day without the meds all together, but I don't want to rush.) I now have a mostly clear pallet to work on. Even still, though, I noticed that my thoughts still leaned on the negative side.
That's where these books come in and help me to control my thoughts in a healthier, more productive way. It's interesting to note that this is not the first time I've read "Awaken the Giant Within". I did many years ago, with the hope that it alone would fix my problem. It didn't. My brain was so far out of whack, that I couldn't focus or control my emotions and thoughts long enough to effectively utilize the techniques.
Now my story is different! I've got control physiologically. So, I now work to control my thoughts as effectively. And I think it's working well!
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
"Food Glorious Fooood!" (song from Oliver)
Wow. Am I finding that what I eat specifically and quickly affects the way I feel. In as quickly as 15 - 20 minutes immediately following consuming something, I've noticed my mood changes based on what I ate. It's fantastic! It's exciting! It's unbelievable! Duh! It's what Christian has been saying all along.
I guess I see it with my own two eyes, now, every time I glance at my Diet Diary. This is a little journal I've been taking part in the last couple of days, to monitor exactly what foods produce what feelings and states. I know, this might sound weird, but I swear, it's happening to me and it's powerful.
First of all, let me recap quickly and just say that I've eliminated most of the stimulants from my diet completely. No refined sugar. No alcohol. No illegal drugs of any kind. No caffeine. (Coffee was a toughy but getting rid of it has been amazing - once the headaches ended, that is!) As a result, my anxiety levels are MUCH lower now and my energy is up! Thank the Lord in Heaven!!!
Anyhow, back to the "food, glorious ..." - you know how it goes.
I noticed this morning that I was feeling really good after drinking my whole fruit smoothie that I blend up just about every morning. This smoothie has replaced my usual morning ritual of a cup of anxiety invoking java. And the point is I felt amazing - without caffeine!
So then, something else happened to me a bit later. I arrived at mom and dad's house (the usual location I end up spending the day at, in case dad and I need to work) and I noticed I was a bit frustrated with the computer being slow to start up. On the way over, the early morning show on the radio had a debate that I wanted to participate in. I wanted to email them my response to what they were discussing. So I ran inside and onto the computer, realizing it was off. I eagerly pushed the "ON" button and waited... and waited... and waited. As I impatiently watched the monitor slowly turn on and the windows begin to wake, I became more and more irritated. The show was ending and I wasn't going to get across my point. The computer slowly lagged on a screen, then a minute later another necessary window popped up. I knew there were 5 more to go, each taking a couple of minutes spaced between, meaning... I was going to miss my opportunity to send my message! Dang computer! (Pardon my French.)
I was irritated, obviously. But then I had an idea popped into my head. The sugar in the fruit must have amped me up. I wanted to eat something that would bring me down a bit. I had already heard of the subtly sedative qualities of brown rice. But yesterday, I ate some sunflower seeds and noticed I felt the same thing. They brought me down a bit. Granted, this was a very light but definitely a distinct feeling. (I've become very attuned to the subtlety of my states of mind. I've read before that this may have to do with my social anxiety. It makes you very perceptive internally - actually to a fault, in the past. But now, it's become an excellent tool.)
So, I tried the sunflower seeds and what do you know? They brought me down to a great level again. I wasn't agitated any longer. I felt terrific again.
This is a huge revelation and invaluable lesson. So I will continue today and from now on to take heed to which foods I eat and the affect that they have directly and quickly on my mind. Very exciting for me. A whole new direction!
Just so you know, I've learned that fruit has a gentle upper action. (Probably due to the sugar.) Protein in nuts seems to stabilize or drop down and veggies seem mostly neutral. When I continue to learn more, I'll pass on the info to you, so stay tuned!
I guess I see it with my own two eyes, now, every time I glance at my Diet Diary. This is a little journal I've been taking part in the last couple of days, to monitor exactly what foods produce what feelings and states. I know, this might sound weird, but I swear, it's happening to me and it's powerful.
First of all, let me recap quickly and just say that I've eliminated most of the stimulants from my diet completely. No refined sugar. No alcohol. No illegal drugs of any kind. No caffeine. (Coffee was a toughy but getting rid of it has been amazing - once the headaches ended, that is!) As a result, my anxiety levels are MUCH lower now and my energy is up! Thank the Lord in Heaven!!!
Anyhow, back to the "food, glorious ..." - you know how it goes.
I noticed this morning that I was feeling really good after drinking my whole fruit smoothie that I blend up just about every morning. This smoothie has replaced my usual morning ritual of a cup of anxiety invoking java. And the point is I felt amazing - without caffeine!
So then, something else happened to me a bit later. I arrived at mom and dad's house (the usual location I end up spending the day at, in case dad and I need to work) and I noticed I was a bit frustrated with the computer being slow to start up. On the way over, the early morning show on the radio had a debate that I wanted to participate in. I wanted to email them my response to what they were discussing. So I ran inside and onto the computer, realizing it was off. I eagerly pushed the "ON" button and waited... and waited... and waited. As I impatiently watched the monitor slowly turn on and the windows begin to wake, I became more and more irritated. The show was ending and I wasn't going to get across my point. The computer slowly lagged on a screen, then a minute later another necessary window popped up. I knew there were 5 more to go, each taking a couple of minutes spaced between, meaning... I was going to miss my opportunity to send my message! Dang computer! (Pardon my French.)
I was irritated, obviously. But then I had an idea popped into my head. The sugar in the fruit must have amped me up. I wanted to eat something that would bring me down a bit. I had already heard of the subtly sedative qualities of brown rice. But yesterday, I ate some sunflower seeds and noticed I felt the same thing. They brought me down a bit. Granted, this was a very light but definitely a distinct feeling. (I've become very attuned to the subtlety of my states of mind. I've read before that this may have to do with my social anxiety. It makes you very perceptive internally - actually to a fault, in the past. But now, it's become an excellent tool.)
So, I tried the sunflower seeds and what do you know? They brought me down to a great level again. I wasn't agitated any longer. I felt terrific again.
This is a huge revelation and invaluable lesson. So I will continue today and from now on to take heed to which foods I eat and the affect that they have directly and quickly on my mind. Very exciting for me. A whole new direction!
Just so you know, I've learned that fruit has a gentle upper action. (Probably due to the sugar.) Protein in nuts seems to stabilize or drop down and veggies seem mostly neutral. When I continue to learn more, I'll pass on the info to you, so stay tuned!
Sunday, August 9, 2009
I'm baaaaack!
Sorry it took a little bit before I got back to you guys. Just wanted to let you know that everything is so far so good with school. (Yes - I'm planning on going back in the fall - which is only a couple of weeks!) I have everything required in for both schools that I applied to. Just waiting and hoping that the processing doesn't take too long and they bump me back to Spring enrollment. I'll keep you guys posted, though.
Things have been good with the diet but I really kicked it up a notch. I've gotten very serious about it by cutting out meat, dairy, sugar and wheat gluten as well as everything else I had already been cutting. That means I can eat only veggies out of the garden (or frozen), fruit, brown rice, nuts and seeds and possibly some fish. Actually, it makes for a really nutritious, healthy diet! I'm eating to live, not living to eat! I've decided to experiment with it for about 2 weeks to see if that makes any differences. I'm betting it will.
I cut out coffee and alcohol too! No stimulants. It was a rough day after no coffee, let me tell you. I had a nasty headache and was extra sleepy, but apparently that's normal from coffee withdraw. Kind of made me aware that I was addicted to it too, to have that adverse reaction after stopping it. So that made me feel good to recognize that. By the way, it passed and now I feel really good.
As for the mid afternoon sleepiness that I had been experiencing, I gained control over that by taking most of my medication at night. This helped considerably. I then take part of one of my meds around 10:00am with fish oil (that's new!) and the first pill out of 2 of Resveratrol. It seems to be working well for me.
So I'm still letting things play out and experimenting with food, but I'm getting really close to having this all under control. Not bad, considering this amazing change just started approximately 2 1/2 months ago. It's also exciting to know that food has such a big role in our health. I thought I knew before, but really had no idea! I'm also exercising now too and that helps. Instead of grabbing a cup of coffee, I go for a walk on the treadmill or outside.
For the first time in my life I'm really taking care of myself. I should start noticing a change in the way I look as well. I'm eating so healthy now and exercising, I can't imagine that I wouldn't start loosing weight. That'll be fun to watch.
I feel very proud. It's all a good feeling. And for this Schizo Affective Bipolar Disordered Social Phobic, feeling good is the name of the game!
Things have been good with the diet but I really kicked it up a notch. I've gotten very serious about it by cutting out meat, dairy, sugar and wheat gluten as well as everything else I had already been cutting. That means I can eat only veggies out of the garden (or frozen), fruit, brown rice, nuts and seeds and possibly some fish. Actually, it makes for a really nutritious, healthy diet! I'm eating to live, not living to eat! I've decided to experiment with it for about 2 weeks to see if that makes any differences. I'm betting it will.
I cut out coffee and alcohol too! No stimulants. It was a rough day after no coffee, let me tell you. I had a nasty headache and was extra sleepy, but apparently that's normal from coffee withdraw. Kind of made me aware that I was addicted to it too, to have that adverse reaction after stopping it. So that made me feel good to recognize that. By the way, it passed and now I feel really good.
As for the mid afternoon sleepiness that I had been experiencing, I gained control over that by taking most of my medication at night. This helped considerably. I then take part of one of my meds around 10:00am with fish oil (that's new!) and the first pill out of 2 of Resveratrol. It seems to be working well for me.
So I'm still letting things play out and experimenting with food, but I'm getting really close to having this all under control. Not bad, considering this amazing change just started approximately 2 1/2 months ago. It's also exciting to know that food has such a big role in our health. I thought I knew before, but really had no idea! I'm also exercising now too and that helps. Instead of grabbing a cup of coffee, I go for a walk on the treadmill or outside.
For the first time in my life I'm really taking care of myself. I should start noticing a change in the way I look as well. I'm eating so healthy now and exercising, I can't imagine that I wouldn't start loosing weight. That'll be fun to watch.
I feel very proud. It's all a good feeling. And for this Schizo Affective Bipolar Disordered Social Phobic, feeling good is the name of the game!
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Sorry I haven't posted as much as usual this last week or so. It's been hectic getting ready for school and, I have to admit, my brain has been a bit off. This of course is due to my meddling with my meds and supplements. See I used to take them at around 9:00 am. I have since switched the time, since I was getting sleepy around 4:00 pm, to the evening. I also must admit that I got a little cocky and tried cutting down a bit on them - not much, just a tad - too much apparently. And then throw this into the mix; I also went to a wedding and literally pigged out on plates of pork! See, the caterer had these delightfully delicious bacon wrapped asparagus appetizers. I tried one justifying that it was "basically" a whole food. The asparagus, of course, was fine. The bacon however - not so much. See, this was a store bought prepackaged product that was undoubtedly laced with more glutamate than I've ingested in weeks. It wouldn't have been bad had I'd eaten 1, 2 or maybe 3. No - I emptied 1/2 the contents of that industrial sized serving tray of Glutamate into my gullet. Could that have been part of the cause to my dumpy mood (first time in quite awhile I must say)? Perhaps.
What ever the cause (I always seek to find it so not to make the same mistakes again), I yesterday and today felt off. What did this look like for me? My head was foggy - memory and thoughts were not as clear. I was pissy and sarcastic. I even felt a tinge of social anxiety coming back at the thought of doing a speech for Toast Masters or even talking with a group of people. In other words, my old crap was lurching back... it felt.
What changed it? This morning I decided to take an extra Resveratrol pill. I already had taken one the night before as well as resorted to taking my originally recommended doses of my previously mentioned supplements and meds. In no time after taking the additional Resveratrol, my head cleared and mood perked up. This makes me wonder if I did have too much residual Glutamate built up in my system from the damned pork gorging incident.
Conclusion? I plan on continuing to take my other pills at night, however, I will now take Resv in the morning and possibly in the afternoon. (I will try to take 2 pills per day now.)
Also - no more pigging out on pig!
(unless it's organic, of course...) ;)
What ever the cause (I always seek to find it so not to make the same mistakes again), I yesterday and today felt off. What did this look like for me? My head was foggy - memory and thoughts were not as clear. I was pissy and sarcastic. I even felt a tinge of social anxiety coming back at the thought of doing a speech for Toast Masters or even talking with a group of people. In other words, my old crap was lurching back... it felt.
What changed it? This morning I decided to take an extra Resveratrol pill. I already had taken one the night before as well as resorted to taking my originally recommended doses of my previously mentioned supplements and meds. In no time after taking the additional Resveratrol, my head cleared and mood perked up. This makes me wonder if I did have too much residual Glutamate built up in my system from the damned pork gorging incident.
Conclusion? I plan on continuing to take my other pills at night, however, I will now take Resv in the morning and possibly in the afternoon. (I will try to take 2 pills per day now.)
Also - no more pigging out on pig!
(unless it's organic, of course...) ;)
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